What I Did on My Blogging Hiatus

Sorry for the long silence, guys. As many of you already know, August is the cruellest month, whatever that headcase Elliot might have to say about the matter. The good news is that I've had many adventures since last I blogged. Some having to do with the university, like weaselling my way into the very closed course I've had my eye on since April, and formulating syllabi,-boi,-buses ... look, don't let's be pedantic about it, damn you. Where was I? Oh, yes. Employment. I've decided to take the support offered by the department which is not my own, because, well, they pay way more. This is good, but means that I have to brush up on some old knowledge. Good thing I'm one of those folks who likes learning, right?

I managed to injure myself at the Summer Job, and have spent the past few weeks under the influence of some very powerful pharmaceuticals. That sucked. It was especially humiliating when I would try to go grocery shopping and little old women would get pissed off and wheel their walkers around me in the pasta aisle because I was moving so slowly. I'm back at about 98% now, though. (I was at 99%, but I went for a hike and misread the trail marker. So, I wound up on a very demanding five-mile hike rather than the cute little 1/2 mile starter hike I wanted to do.) I considered joining a few friends to adjunct at the local CC to try to earn back the money I lost while hallucinating, but CC adjuncts make about $3 per year, so phooey on them. I will need research time, and that can't be bought for a measly three bucks.

But my life hasn't all been crass materialism and Hippie chic this month. I finally met my new grand-niece. She's very small, and occasionally quite loud, and enjoys listening to the speeches of one Winston Churchill read in an impossibly poor facsimile of a British accent. This is very convenient, because I happen to know some Churchill speeches and do a really bad impression of a Brit. See how things work out? She especially likes the bit about "fighting them on the beaches, and in the air..." For my part, I love to see a good warrior spirit in a bald midget. Sadly, she also enjoys peeing on my couch and spitting up down my shirt. I am told that these hobbies will pass, though.

So, now that I've adjusted to premature great-aunt status, chased away all the paisley elephants, and figured out a way to be financially secure for the next few months, I can get back to the important business of blogging.